Security management types are supposed to be mirthless, all-too-serious drones who go about their duties in a mean-spirited and obstructionist way. Some corporate leaders even refer to security managers as splinters to be encountered as one slides down the bannister of life.

But, that's not my experience. Security managers can be just as much fun - perhaps in a twisted sort of way sometimes - as any other profession. For example, in my previous life in the intelligence community, we had a saying that intelligence officers had to be like professional football players: big enough to play and dumb enough to think it's important.

Security managers have that same kind of outlook in many cases. As a matter of fact, over the past couple of months, I've been in contact with some very professional security managers as we've formed a new group.

The group had its origins in a conversation where animal rights organizations and their activities were the topic of the moment. But, the group got its real start when we reached common agreement on a central point: some people are more violently opposed to fur than to leather because it's easier to harass rich women outside department stores than motorcycle gangs in bars.

Perhaps you might even think about joining after reading about the organization.

We're calling it People for the Ethical Treatment of Information (PETI). In fact, it will be modeled on PETA - People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals - and may use some of the methods that have allowed them to get the media's attention. (PETA should not be confused with their counterpoint organization by the same initials - also in Norfolk, VA - which stands for People Eating Tons of Animals.)

In PETI, just like PETA, there are few rules and no sacred cows. Indeed, the real meat of the issue is that almost anyone with a beef can form a group and gain attention with some well- greased public acts.

Imagine for a moment how PETI people might emulate the acts of PETA's membership.

PETA's members approach fur-wearing dowagers in front of theaters in New York, throwing blood on their expensive coats. PETI members, on the other hand, might approach the heads of companies known to be unscrupulous in their attempts to collect sensitive corporate information. What a sight on the evening news: the CEO of the offending company having a couple of boxes of cross-cut, shredded documents showered on his well-manicured lawn.

PETA member and sex-kitten Brigitte Bardot sends off a letter to the Pope, asking him to halt the "cruel experiments" on her fellow kittens at Boys Town National Research Laboratory which had been discovered by PETA's undercover investigation. As PETI members, we might consider having a prominent American Catholic write to the Pope, asking that he actively discourage the French from conducting international economic espionage operations against the United States.

The starlet Kim Basinger barely got noticed in Korea even though her eye-opening "Rather Go Naked Than Wear Fur" billboard ads got noticed in other, more sensitive parts of the world. The Korea Outdoor Advertising Association banned the naked ad, saying in a letter to PETA that "Korea is essentially unconcerned with animal welfare issues." Yet PETA won't stop running the ad in Korea, since they believe that "Koreans have the right to know that the fur industry drowns, beats, strangles, and electrocutes animals for their pelts." It's that kind of persistence that made us think of getting Peter Falk in his Lieutenant Columbo role, rooting around in an aromatic dumpster au naturel, examining sensitive documents inadvertently thrown into the trash. The mind simply boggles at the potential impact of such a billboard.

Congress had an opportunity to choose between the American Meat Institute's "snouts and tails" hot dog lunch and PETA's vegetarians who were wearing nothing but lettuce leaves in strategic locations. The "Lettuce Ladies" were passing out veggie-based "not dogs" in order to promote a humane diet. Ted Koppel would never be able to resist the story if the ASIS Standing Committee on Safeguarding Proprietary Information were to march from Arlington to Capitol Hill - especially if they were wearing only well-placed access badges - to expose monetary losses caused by improper document handling, storage and transmission.

Not too long ago in downtown San Antonio a PETA member climbed atop a billboard high above Elm Street and, "impaled" on a 5-foot-long meat hook--unfurled a giant banner with a traffic-stopping vegetarian message. The sign was titled "Hooked On Meat," was shown just in time to coincide with the kickoff of the Texas Poultry Federation's annual convention in the same city. It asked meat-eaters to kick their meat addiction and call PETA's toll-free veggie hotline (1-888-VEG-FOOD) for free vegetarian recipes, citing the fact that "even Chelsea Clinton has given beef the boot." Taking another lesson from PETA, PETI will be setting up its own toll free number (1-888-SECRETS), along with its website (www.keepout.com) where callers and surfers alike can get the latest tips on restricting access to their information.

Another example is that some PETA members lock themselves in wire cages in the summertime in order to highlight how animals suffer on fur farms, especially during the summer when hundreds of thousands of foxes, minks, and other animals suffer from dizziness and vomiting before dying of heat exhaustion. There are undoubtedly people inside your organization who might merit such treatment. Go ahead. Admit it. It's hard to get that one particular person's picture out of your mind's eye at the moment, isn't it? It's even harder to convince yourself that he or she doesn't look good in a cage in the sun, right? But, no matter how psychically rewarding that image may be, the actual event might not have a long term and positive effect on your information security program.

So, we're clearly not suggesting that all of PETA's models are good ones for a security manager. But, there are ways of getting peoples' attention inside your own organization. Indeed, sometimes we have to get employee and management attention before we can get cooperation and participation in an effective information security program. A couple of thoughts outside the box might just be the attention getter you need to go from where you are to where you want to go - today.

About the author: John A. Nolan, III CPP, OCP is Chairman and Managing Director of Phoenix Consulting Group, which provides competitive intelligence, counterintelligence and professional development/training programs across a variety of industries. He is also a co-founder of The Centre for Operational Business Intelligence in Sarasota, FL where corporate intelligence practitioners from around the country and the world learn the tools and techniques necessary to prevail in the marketplace. His newest book, “CONFIDENTIAL”:Uncover Your Competitor's Top Secrets Legally and Quickly - And Protect Your Own was released by HarperCollins Business Books in June 1999. He is frequently featured in national and international media such as Forbes, George, Times of London and CNN, to name just a few. He can be reached at jnolan@intellpros.com, or at 1.800.440.1724